


To Dallas With Love

by PanicsOnTheHorizon



Series: To the NHL with Love [4]
Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, Coming Out, Dallas Stars, Facing Fears, Jealousy, M/M, Multi, Tyler's not completly immature, captain!Jamie, gay hockey players, love is all you need
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-12-28
Updated: 2015-02-07
Packaged: 2018-03-04 01:29:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 8,255
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2904311
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PanicsOnTheHorizon/pseuds/PanicsOnTheHorizon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>"Tyler," Jamie sank slowly onto the hotel bed adjacent from Tyler. "I hope you know how important you are, not just to the team, but... but also to me. A-and I want you to understand that I love you, Ty. I love everything about you.. You're, you're just," The older man trailed off, lost for words as he stared into the center's eyes.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>  <em>Tyler's face burned with the fact that tears were starting to blur his vision. "No one's ever told me they love me just for... well, me.</em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>  <em></em></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Just one good thing inside of me

**Author's Note:**

> This is my contribution to the _To the NHL With Love_ series! And it's also my first time trying a Tyler/Jamie fic sooo I hope it's good
> 
> All feedback is welcome so don't be afraid to comment!
> 
> also if you've stumbled upon this by googling yourself or someeone you know... well I suggest you finding the nearest exit and never returning

Tyler's never been oblivious to the things being said about him.

_Tyler : Not Mature Enough For The NHL_

_Seguin... Hockey player or Party animal?_

_Another Night Out With #19..._

And don't even get him started on all the photots manipulating into being incriminating. Don't get him wrong, Tyler knew that being drafted into the NHL meant that he'd be scrutinized by pretty much everyone. But how did that mean that something as mundane as have drinks with a few of the guys be spun into some outrageous drunken sex scandal? The world he lives in is a messed up one.

Honestly, none of this stuff would've really bothered the center if it hadn't started affecting his hockey. His teammates stopped taking him quite as seriously, going from a potential top forward to another clueless rookie. People started shouting nasty things to him on the ice, started hitting him to injure. Even his parent's view of him became downgraded and that hurt the most. No matter what he thought he'd always have the love and support of his fellow hockey playing parents. But he was wrong. The only person whose ever completly stood by him is his sister Cassidy, but even sometimes her faith is shaky.

It always hurts to know you're basically facing diversity. If only he could tell everyone why he wasn't some stupid kid who gets insanely drunk and sleeps with dozens of girls. If only he could be himself, be up front with everyone. Damn the homophobic world he lives in.

Tyler sighs as he strips his sweaty workout clothes off and steps into a steaming shower.And when he got out the water had turned frezing, his appendages pruny. He didn't want to walk into TD tomorrow for what could possibly be the last time. He doesn't want to be thrown into free agency. He's terrified of the unknown because there's always a possiblity of no one wanting him, no one beliving that he's good enough.

He doesn't get any sleep that night.

*

It hadn't gone as badly as he envisioned. He went into TD a nervous wreck, fretting over his future, and left with a job offer. In Dallas. It wasn't the most convenient of places, but the center hardly found it in himself to care. Somebody was interested. _In him._ That's all he was really thinking about.

Apparently someone from the organization paid for the plane ticket, so all Tyler had to do was pack. It took longer than it should have, emptying out his apartment. He was never really the best at covering up his emotions, so it's possible that he shed a tear or two looking at the impersonal look of the room. It was like he never even lived there... but he'd never admit it. He was just glad that they booked him the earliest flight possible.

And he shut the door without ever looking back.

*

Because of a "small" delay, ( _whoever classified an hour and a half as small is full of shit_ ) Tyler finally boarded the plane that would take him to his new home. It was thrilling as well as terrifying.

The last thing that ran through his mind before takeoff was how desperate he was for thisto be a new beginning.


	2. I've got my scars right here

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so just a little bit of clarification.. I'm not entirely sure that Tyler and Beau actually know each other. But they were in the same draft class, they're the same age, and their personalities are pretty similar so I thought, why not!

"Hello." His best friend's overly perky voice came through his receiver.

"Hey, Beau." Tyler felt himself sigh internally. Nothing relaxed him more than talking to the Califotnia native, well, other than being on the ice of course. "What's up, man?"

"Oh, ya know. Same old, same old. Yeah, so I heard about you leaving Boston. That's gotta suck." Even though Beau was going for total nonchalance, Tyler heard right through it.

"At first it did. But, Hey. Dallas doesn't seem that bad. Plus it'll give me a chance to... start over, ya know?"

"Yeah. For sure, man." He could practically hear the smile in the blonde's voice. "Good luck."

"Thanks, bro. And don't worry, you're not going to be a baby Pen for much longer." He chirped, using the nickname for Pittsburgh's AHL league.

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever." The blonde loaded his voice with fake annoyance.

They only talked for a few minutes longer, Beau having to waken up early the next morning. Man the time zones made his head hurt.

*

It was the first day of training camp. Tyler was extremly nervous as he approached American Airlines Center. The place of his, hopefully, new beginning.

He tried to keep his hand from shaking as he reached to open the locker room door. Taking a deep breath, he slowly pulled it open.

"Hey!" A voice from behind him yelled. "Wait up!" Tyler spun around to see a gray suited figure approaching him, duffle bad bouncing beside him as he jogged to reach the open door.The man beamed at him. "Thanks."

"Yeah sure, man." He smiled timidly back, taking in his crisp cut hair and soft brown eyes. "You're Jamie Benn, right?"

"Yup, but that's Captain Benn to you," Jamie winked at him before extended his hand. "And you must be Tyler. Welcome to Dallas." The center vigorously shook his hand. "C'mon in and I'll find you a locker."

"Yeah, sounds good."

Tyler felt less nervous this time as he turned to enter the locker room. Having Jamie as a captain made it a little easier, he was already being kinder towards Tyler than Chara ever was.

"'Kay. Here ya go." The winger smiled at him while standing next to an empty locker. Tyler smiled back as he put his bag down and watched him move down three spaces before dropping his own stuff. He reached up to pat his nameplate before taking off his suit jacket.

Tyler quickly averted his eyes, not wanting to be accused of staring, and began to quietly survey the room. The were barely a handful of guys moseying around, slowly dressing for their first day back. Tyler shrugged to himself, deciding to do the same, knowing he'd need a decent amount of time to get relaxed enough. And boy, did he really need it.

*

Practice was fucking brutal. Okay, to be honest, they weren't being pushed that hard. Tyler just was unprepared for it. They barely did one-fourth of that work with him in Boston. And it just drained him. It did get a little better when Jamie came up to him after practice, though.

"Hey, Tyler." The captain's voice was sort of breathy sounding. "I know you're new here, but do you want to get some drinks at the end of the week or something?"

Tyler looked at the older man for a minute while rolling the idea over in his head. "Yeah, sure," he finally agreed. "Sounds fun."

"Great,." The winger gave him a friendly elbow before going to his stall. Tyler was smiling as he turned towards his own.

He was still smiling as he laid in his bed that night, knowing that he was going to end up being right about Dallas.


	3. I wanna blow you... away

Tyler was pretty convinced that Jamie hadn't been serious about getting drinks together. But here they are, a week later, in a quick bar waiting on a nice lady with hot pink hair to bring them a round of shots.

"So, how're you liking Dallas? You find a good place?" Jamie was tapping his fingers on the table along to the song that was faint in the background.

"Yeah. Uh, there was an apartment open a few blocks from here actually. Little smaller than the one I had in Boston, but. I like it, so." He shrugged to emphasize his point.

"That's great. I'm really happy you're here." The brunette gave the center a shy smile that he wasn't sure what to do with. He smiled back.

"Happy to be here."

The waitress brought their drinks then and Jamie thanked her with politeness that was purely Canadian. He lifted one of the small glasses and said, "Here's to new beginnings."

Tyler laughed, it was like the brunette had read his mind. "Cheers, man."

They spent the next few hours drinking and just talking. It was something Tyler hasn't done in a while and it felt really nice. By the time they decided to leave they were too buzzed to drive, but not completly drunk. They had to hail a cab though, one for each of them.

"I had a lot of fun tonight, Ty." Jamie commented as they stood together, waiting. "We should do it again, eh?"

The center couldn't stop himself from smiling. "Yeah, like. Just, yes, of course.I'd love to." He saw the winger smile back at him. Tyler found himself staring into those soft brown eyes that had been the first to greet him at the Airlines Center, felt himself getting lost. And Jamie was holding his gaze just as intently. It made something deep within Tyler pulse, something he wasn't used to. He never wanted it to stop. But he was plucked from his haze by the sound of a horn.

Tyler's head snapped forward to see a yellow taxi pulled to the curb. He blushed as he looked back at Jamie. "So I'll see you later, man." He waved before getting into the cab and giving the guy his address. Risking one last glimpse at his captain who was still staring intently through the window at him, a slightly confused twist to his face.

When later thinking about it, Tyler just blamed it on the alcohol, but secretly wondered if it was more.

*

They won their first game of the regular season. It was a sloppy, dirty game against the Philadelphia Flyers. And with the help of Kari they managed to shut them out 3-0. The win plus the fact that Tyler assisted on a Gonchar goal as well as scoring one of his own, well, there was nothing that could've wiped the smile off his face.

"Good job, boys!" Jamie addressed the happily buzzing locker room as he stripped down to his sweaty Under Armour.

"We're definitely gettin' drunk tonight!" Roussel called from across the locker room accompanied by ridiculous looking first pumps that earned him a fair amount of laughs. Tyler even joined in as he saw Jamie do the same. He was sort of nervous, though. He didn't want his reputation to catch up with him this fast, even though it was inevitable. As long as he was able to limit himself, he thought it would be okay. The last thing he wanted to do was embarass himself in front of his new team. Especially in front of Jamie. It's not like the majority of stories are true or anything. Tyler doesn't find montages of girls to have sex with every night. Hell, he's never even slept with one. The part about him liking to drink may have some truth to it. But he's newly twenty-one. It's just a phase that he can get over if he wantedto...

"You gonna show us how to party tonight, eh, Segs?" The voice from the stall on his right sliced through his mental worries. All he could do in response to the goalie was laugh and shrug his shoulders, desperately hoping that wouldn't be the case.

And, well... a man can dream, can't he?

*

The bar they went to was pretty busy, very unlike the one he and Jamie rendevoused at. Here you were prety much shoulder to shoulder with everyone around you. Normally, that wouldn't have bothered Tyler. But tonight was different. Tonight, _he_ had to be different.

Once they found an empty booth big enough for their entourage, they sat and asked the lady who scrambled over to them for two rounds of shots. She smiled before scurrying away again. She looked exactly like Tyler felt. Stressed.

Tyler looked to his right as saw that he was, happily, squished up against Jamie who was yelling something across the table at Goligoski that had everyone laughing. Jamie must've felt Tyler's gaze on him because he turned to face the center, giving him the same shy smile that he's been giving Tyler since the day they met. He couldn't help but smile back.

"Are y'all just gonna stare each other or are we gon' drink?" Antoine's voice made Tyler look away from his captain. He saw that the shots had arrived and he felt a blush creep over his face.

"Hell yeah we're going to drink." Jamie said, obviously unphased by his teammate calling them out. He reached over and snagged one for Tyler and one for himself. "Let's get ready fora whole year of this boys!" There were various sounds of agreement as everyone downed their shots. Tyler watched Jamie as he tilted his head back, revealing his pale neck, and swallowed his down before quickly following suit.

Everyone went for their second pretty fast and someone, probably Kari, ordered more. Tyler could tell this was going to be a long night.

*

Tyler felt groggy, stiff, and just plain shitty. He felt sunlight shining against his eyelids and an insane pounding in his head. In an attempt to roll over and catch some more sleep, he ends up rolling onto the floor. A tile floor? 

"What the fuck happened to my carpet?" He croaked out, throat dry. As he pushed himself off the ground, he took in his surroundings. The blinds that were on his windows were now mahogany colored curtains. The baby blue walls a deep green. _What the fuck happened to his room?_

"Tyler?" The center thought he heard a voice coming from the other room. "Are you awake?"

Too startled to form a coherent response, he sat back down on a bed way too big to be his own and dropped his head in his hands.

He heard a noise in the doorway, but his head hurt too damn much to lift it up again. "Tyler?" It was the same voice. He heard them approaching and suddenly there was a calloused hand resting on his shoulder. Unable to handle the mystery any longer, he looked up. And the first thing he saw were soft, brown eyes.

It took everything Tyler had to stop himself from leaning into his touch. "Jamie? Where am I?"

The captain laughed. "My house. You were _way_ too wasted to drive," Tyler had to stifle a groan, "And you never gave me your address or anything, so.." the captain trailed off with a shrug.

Tyler was mortified. "Jamie.. I.."

"Don't apologize, Ty. You can actually hold your liquor better than half the guys can." Jamie laughed. "Now drink the water I left for you. There are aspirins and clean clothes in the bathroom.

Tyler smiled. "Thanks, Jamie. For everything."

The brunette gave his shoulder a squeeze. "Anything for you, Ty."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for all the drinking happening in this chapter. I didn't really realize it until afterwards so yeah, oh well. Hope it was still good! All comments are appreciated:)


	4. Letting people down is my thing, baby

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok, I'm sorry. I know I'm being kinda hand-wave-ish about some facts. And honestly I doubt Beau was even playing at this point in time last year, but for the story. Let's please just pretend he did :)

"Tylerrr!" Beau practicaly screamed into the receiver and into Tyler's ear. "Guess who just landed in Dallas!"

The center felt himself laugh at the genuine excitement in twenty-two year old's voice. "Hm. I don't know, Beau. Give me a hint?"

Beau made an incredulous noise. "Me you jackass! And I'm coming over as soon as my, uh, friend finishes getting his shit unloaded."

He heard something off in his friend's voice, but he decided not to push it. "'Kay, man. I'll text you the address?"

The blonde snorted. "Yeah, that'd be great." He paused for a second before continuing in a quieter voice. "If you just want me to come by myself, I get that. Just say somethin' and I'll-"

"S'okay, Beau." He cut him off. "I don't care, man."

Beau was quiet for another minute and Tyler could practically imagine the way the blonde's face scrunched up in thought. "You could bring someone, too."

It was Tyler's turn for silence. "Yeah, sure," he finally agreed. "If it'll make you feel better."

"Yay! Thanks. Love you, Seggs!" Beau's smile was pretty evident.

"Yeah, yeah. See you when you get here."

Tyler ended the call and texted Beau before looking through his list of contacts, even though he already knew who he wanted to bring. He felt a knot of unwanted worry twist in his gut. _What if he said no?_

He figured sending a text was better than calling. And he rewrote it three times before he actually sent anything.

_Hey, Chubbs. It's Tyler. I've got a question for ya :) ___

Surprising to the center, he didn't have to wait long for a reply: _what's up Ty?_

_nm I've got a friend from pittsburgh coming over & he's bringin someone so I wanted to know if maybe u would wanta come over??_

He hoped his nervousness wasn't so obvious. When Jamie didn't text back right away, Tyler went to get a bottle of gatorade(he has to stay hydrated). There was a new mesage waiting for him that he was almost to chicken to open. Almost.

 _Yeah, for sure!_ The text read. _When you want me over?_

 _um now if that's cool with you,_ he sent along with his address.

_ok Ty. Be there in a few :)_

*

Jamie got there first. Which made sense since he was coming from his house rather than the airport, but still.

"Hey, Ty." Jamie smiled happily as Tyler stepped to the side, allowing him to enter the house. He didn't realize the winger was carrying anything until he held it up. "I brought beer."

Tyler raised his eyebrows at the unexpected gift. "Y-you didn't have to-"

"I _wanted_ to." His captain interupted him with another smile. Tyler looked down as he felt his face heat up.

"T-thanks, man." Jamie just patted his shoulder as he passed the threshold.

The older man set the case down on the table in the center of Tyler's living room before looking around, silently surveying the place. The center hadn't realized he was holding his breath until Jamie finally said something.

"Nice place you got here, Ty." He looked at the winger and was met with soft, brown eyes.

And he felt something inside himself stir as he realized that his eyes were soft with pride. That was something that Tyler yearned to cling to, to capture. He was determined to make sure Jamie would always look at him like that.

A loud knocking at his door broke into their moment(why are they always getting interupted?). The knocking was accompanied by Beau yelling through the door, "Open up, asshat!" Tyler flushed as he opened the door and before he could get any sort of greeting out, a blonde blur jumped on him.

"Holy shit." Tyler said around a laugh as he stumbled back a few steps.

"Oh my _God_ , Seggs! I missed you _so_ much." Beau had his arms wrapped tightly around his waist and Tyler was hugging him back just as hard.

"Missed you, too, Sunshine." He managed to mutter around a fluff of blonde hair stuck in his face.

Beau let out a laugh and squeezed him once before letting go. " _Obviously,_ " the American winked. "And Seggs, this is my... friend, Rob Bortuzzo. Bort for short."

Standing behind Beau was a tall guy, at least three or four inches taller than Beau and himself. He had his toned arms(not that Tyler was really looking or anything) folded over the Penguins logo centering his tshirt. He gave the center a tight lipped smile, but his jaw was visibly clenched as he offered Tyler his hand to shake.

Tyler accepted it with hesitating. "Hey, man."

"'Sup?" Was his response.

"Well, uh, c'mon in." Tyler looked between the two men and made a gesture for them to follow him. As he turned around, he saw that Jamie had easily sprawled himself on a couch cushion, scrolling through something on his phone. Honestly, just seeing him so comfortable there, so at-home looking, it did something funny to Tyler's insides.

Jamie looked up as all three men came into the room. He greeted them with a smile. And he felt something grab his arm.

"Is that Jamie Benn Sitting on your couch?" Beau whispered in his ear, half hidden behind Tyler's back. His eyes were wide.

Tyler had to hold back a chuckle. "Uh y-yeah, why?" Jamie gave him an amused expression from his place on the couch.

"Oh, nothing," the blonde said. "Just wonderin'."

Tyler gave his best friend a strange look before formally introducing Jamie to Beau and Rob, even though they obviously already knew who he was.

"It's nice to meet you guys." Jamie smiled at them again. "But I'm sorry to say I'm not gonna feel so bad when Ty and I beat you tomorrow night."

"Likewise." Rob replied with a chuckle and a much kinder smile than the one he gave Tyler.

"Okay!" Beau piped up. "Who wants to get their ass kicked in Mario Kart?"

"Really?" Tyler laughed as the blonde bounced over to the couch and plopped down next to Jamie. "The only one gettin' their ass kicked is going to be you!"

"Yeah, well. We'll see about that." Beau slitted his eyes at the center in what, Tyler guessed, was supposed to be a threatening manner. It really just made him laugh harder.

"'Kay, since y'all are being serious, I'm gonna go ahead and bust out the drinks." Jamie all but jumped off the couch, smiling as he walked past Tyler and into the kitchen to get.. God only knows what. Tyler stopped paying attention because as soon as Jamie vacated his seat on the couch, Rob quietly slid in next to Beau. He watched his best friend's eyes light up as the taller man quickly laced his fingers in between the blonde's and. _Oh._ Tyler quickly adverted his eyes as his face felt like it was on fire.

"Are you okay?" Jamie's voice startled the center into jumping. He felt his captain place a firm hand on the small of his back.

"I'm fine, Jamie." He half-smiled at the older man. "C'mon. It's us versus them."

"Sounds good to me." Jamie bumped their shoulders together before continuing into the living room and putting on the table what he retrieved from the kitchen, a bag of Doritos. Yum.

"Alright, boys," Tyler said, turning on the gaming console. "Let's play."

*

After almost two hours and seven beers later, Beau threw his remote in disgust and leaned against Rob's side. "I give up." Rob just laughed and patted his back.

Tyler looked over at Jamie who was casually nursing what was left of his beer. He noticed that they were similarily pressed against one another. But so far Jamie hasn't said anything and Tyler really didn't want to move. So he didn't.

"Ugh, okay, Seggs," Beau said, stretching as he stood. " Bort and I are gonna get out of your hair. This was definitely fun, though. But you're coming up to _me_ next time." They laughed as Tyler was pulled up and enveloped into another huge hug.

The Canadian felt slightly embarassed as tears sprung into his eyes. He buried his nose briefly into the blonde's hair. "See ya tomorrow, Sunshine."

"Yup. Text me, okay?" There was something in Beau's eyes that gave off a sense of urgency, one that Tyler knew all too well. He agreed and thanked Rob for coming.

"You better take care of him." He whispered when pulling the older man in for a bro hug.

Rob looked startled for a moment before quickly recovering and responding with, "Yeah, bro. Always." It made Tyler feel at least a little bit better.

Tyler followed them out onto the driveway and waited with them for a cab. As they were driving away, he waved until they were out of sight.

Sighing, Tyler turned to go back into the apartment. To his surprise, Jamie had cleaned up ad was sitting there, looking expectingly up at Tyler.

"Thanks for inviting me, Ty. I had a lot of fun." Jamie was smiling as he crossed the room to stand in front of Tyler." And I think we should do it again sometime. But maybe, just the two of us?" What his captain did next really surprised him.

Jamie hugged him. Not a bone-crushing one like Beau gives. It was just a gent squeeze around the shoulders. Tyler's arms were a little shaky as they wrapped around the older man's midsection. He just prayed that Jamie couldn't feel just how fast his heart was beating.


	5. Wish I knew then what I know now

"So, Seggs," Goligoski turned around in his seat to face Tyler. "Can you _please_ tell me again why you won't pickup a girl or two, take her home? Thought you were all 'bout that life!"

Tyler sighed. Ever since he refused to take home some "hot" blonde chick who had flirted with him when they were out partying after their win against Pittsburgh, it was something the defenseman would not stop bugging him about. "Because I don't wanta pick up some one night stand. And those articles are bullshit anyway."

Alex raised his eyebrows. "Seriously?!

Tyler shrugged. "Well, yeah. I've never, uh, ya know. I've never picked up anyone. Like ever." Alex blanched at him.

"Just ignore him." Jamie muttered from the seat next to him. Tyler nodded and did exactly that, instead letting his thoughts overtake him.

Okay, it's not exactly true. But he doesn't really count a teammate a pickup. Especially if they've slept together a few times. And it's not like he meant for it to happen, it just did. He doesn't regret it per se, but it's going to make playing Boston tomorrow just that much harder...

His phone vibrated in his pocket. Shaking his head, as if to clear away what he'd been thinking about, he pulled out his phone.

 _New Message: Sunshine_ , it read. He opened it.

_SEGGS! Saw ur playing boston 2mrw, must suck for u :(_

_No,_ he texted back almost immediately. _I'm good, haven't really thought bout it_

The next text read, _oh yeah cause of Jamie right? ;););)_

Tyler looked at the words for what felt like forever, not understanding the American's words. _what r u talkin about Beau_

Beau didn't text back right away, for which Tyler was thankful. He slid his phone back intohis pocket and slumped in his seat, putting his head back against the seat. Sleeping on a plane had never been ideal to Tyler, but he was pretty tired and Beau's text had given him a headache. He snuck a glance over at Jamie who had sometime in the past fifteen minutes also fallen asleep. His mouth was a little bit open and his arms tightly tucked around himself.The last thing Tyler thought about before nodding off was how he how badly he wished those arms were wrapped around his torso instead...

*

Tyler woke up feeling like he hadn't slept at all.. and with a heavy weight pressing against his side. Blinking a few times, he looked down and was greeted with a head of dark hair resting on his shoulder. _Jamie's head_ , he realized,/

Then Jamie stretched, saying something that was muffled by Tyler's shoulder. The captain's hand reached out, across the seat, and landed high on the center's thigh. Tyler froze, barely daring to breathe. Everything in his mind was telling him to wake Jamie up, have him move away. But there was something about the way the winger's touch made his skin heat up, made his heart hammer deep in his chest. Something that just felt _right_ that made Tyler lower his head onto Jamie's and drift back to sleep.

*

They were tied 3-3, 5:37 left in the third quarter. It had been a pretty even game up until this point. We were about to start on a 5-on-3 powerplay off a Lucic roughing call accompanied by a Hamilton unsportamanlike conduct.

Tyler squared his shoulders as he readied to take the faceoff against Campbell. The ref dropped the puck and Tyler's stick shot out, hitting it to whoever was standing on his right. His head snapped up as he straightened his stance and saw Jamie circle around, puck on his stick, looking for someone to pass to. He taped his stick against the ice and Jamie's gaze snapped towards the center. With a wicked slapshot, the puck flew past a Bruins' D-man and was met with the tape of Tyler's stick.

 _This is it,_ Tyler allowed himself to think as he fleeted along the left board of the Bruins' zone. _I could win this!_

But that thought was chased out of his mid just as fast as it had entered when he was roughly, and unexpectingly, checked into the boards and got the puck stripped from him. Tyler lifted his head to see a whole 6'9" of Zdeno Chara standing over him.

"Nice try, kid." The Bruins' captain said before skating off into the Stars' zone. Tyler got up gingerly and followed him, to no avail. Tyler ended up not scoring. But Patrice Bergeron did, exactly three minutes later. It would be the game winning goal.

Tyler let his shoulders slump as he drifted towards his bench. He was suddenly veered to the side by someone's hand. And that hand belonged to a familiar face.

"Hey, Marchy," Tyler said, smiling at the left winger. "What's up, man?"

Brad gave him one of his flashy smile. "Nothin', just wanted to let you know you did a great job out here." The shorter man shrugged kind of sheepishly. "And, ya know, to see if you wanted to go somewhere. For old times sakes?"

Tyler bit his lip as he though for a minute. "Yeah," he shrugged. "Sure, sounds nice."

The winger smiled at him again. "Great, thanks. I'll meet you outside." He patted Tyler's shoulder before skating away towards his bench. Not wanting to be caught staring after him, Tyler lowered his head and finished his journey over to the visitor's bench.

Jamie was waiting for him. "Everything okay?"

Tyler looked into his captain's worry filled eyes. Putting on his best smile, he replied, "Yup. We're just gonna hang for a bit. Catch up and shit."

He got a smile in return. "'Kay, Ty. Have fun."

They walked down the rest of the tunnle, shoulders bumping occasionally. Tyler kept Jamie's words in his mind, making sure that tonight would be nothing but fun.

*

About an hour later, Brad was smiling at Tyler as he parked in front of his house. The center couldn't help but smile back at his old teammate. They walked up to the house in companionable silence. After a minute of fumbling with the keys, the winger pushed open the door. So many memories flooded Tyler's mind, ones he hadn't let himself think about since being traded from Boston.

"Want something to drink?" Brad asked, kicking off his dress shoes and discarding his suit jacket. Tyler nodded. "Great," the winger gave him a comforting smile before heading into the kitchen while rolling his sleeves up to his elbows.

Tyler turned around, heading into the all too familiar living room. As he sank into the plush couch, he took a look around. Nothing had really changed, and Tyler was strangely thankful for that.

"Here, Seggs." Brad came into the room holding to wine glasses and a bottle of the winger's favorite brand of Chardonnay. He sat next to Tyler, so close that their thighs touched, and filled both glasses generously. He handed one to Tyler while lifting the other and saying, "To a great game and having even better friends."

"Cheers, man," Tyler smiled before lifting his glass to his lips and letting the smooth liquid glide down his throat. He felt himself truly begin to relax. "This is really good, March."

Brad smiled, almost as if he was relieved. "Yeah. Why do ya think I drink it?" He laughed before taking a long sip from his glass then setting it down. "So, you like Dallas?"

Tyler very deliberately took a drink, trying to stall. "Yeah, it's okay. The team's really cool, I feel like I've made some good friends already," Tyler paused as Jamie's soft eyes and welcoming smile came to mind. But any thoughts of his captain quickly vanished when Brad put a firm hand on his thigh. He looked up to meet the winger's eyes and the pure heat he found there made Tyler unable to look away.

"That's great, Seggs. I'm happy for you," Brad's voice dropped to barely above a whisper. "But it's been _really_ lonely without you. Not being able to hang out with you, celebrating wins without you. Not being able to do _this_ with you."

Tyler didn't even have time to blink before Brad's lips were on his.

The center could feel his heart beating 90 mph inside his chest. He couldn't believe this was happening. Without really thinking about it, he put his hand on Brad's chest, as if to push him away. But the winger must've gotten the wrong signal because he made a type of moaning sound and pulled Tyler's leg over his lap. Now that the center was facing him, Brad used one hand to cup his cheek and kissed him. Again. This time more firm and with more, just, desperate need.

Tyler doesn't know exactly what he was thinking when his mouth started moving with Brad's, it just happened. And then Tyler didn't want to stop. It was mine making various noises of pleasure, winding his fingers through short, brown hair. It was Tyler that started grinding his hips down on Brad's erection.

This was exactly what he needed.

"Oh, God," Tyler moaned as the winger moved down to suck a mark onto the side of his neck. "B-Brad."

"Yeah, baby," Brad muttered in between kisses. "Say my name."

And that's what Tyler did. His voice slightly cracking as the winger stumbled to find Tyler's zipper. Grunting in frustration, Tyler stood up and practically ripped off his jeans. He felt slightly embarrassed at how hard he looked, but Brad's eyes wiped it away almost before it was a coherent thought.

Making a guttural sounding noise, Brad stood and threw Tyler to where the winger had just been sitting. Sinking onto his knees, Brad pushed Tyler's knees apart. Not even bothering with foreplay of any kind, he stripped Tyler of his boxers. Tyler made a whining sound as his erection bobbed against his stomach, though it didn't stay there for long.

"Ahhh," Tyler moaned loudly as Brad expertly flicked his tongue around the head of his cock. "Brad."

That was apparently all the motivation he needed because the winger then took him down. Not all the way, it was still a little bit of a stretch since they hadn't done anything in a while. But it still felt so damn _good_

It really wasn't long until Tyler was fucking into the winger's mouth. Tyler wouldn't do something like that usually, but Brad was acting just as desperate as the center felt. And it turned him on even more.

Tyler felt a moan leave him throat as he felt his climax coming on. And almost if on queue, Brad slid his mouth of of his cock with a wet popping sound. The center made his dipleasure known with a high pitched whine.

"It'sw alright, baby," the winger whispered, reaching up to kiss his lips. "So good, Seggs. _You're_ so good." With that, the winger took Tyler's slick cock into his hand and jacked him off, quick and efficently. Brad started sucking another spot onto his neck, right under his ear. That pretty much did it for Tyler. 

Tyler came with a sigh, his cum covering his shirt as well as Brad's hand. He watched, mesmerized as Brad leisurely ran licked a section of his hand clean. "Better than I remember," he said, voice husky.

"Come here," Tyler said in a quiet voice. Brad obeyed, a look of want clouding his eyes. Tyler kissed the winger while undoing and shimmying his jeans far enough down his hips to where he could get a hand on his still hard dick. They kept exchanging sloppy kisses as he jacked him off.

Brad gave him a blissful smile after he came. "You wanna go upstairs?"

Tyler smiled back as he thought about it. He ended up shaking his head. "I'd better not." The look the winger gave him was sort of remorseful, but understanding. '"But, um. Can I borrow a clean shirt?"

They both laughed for what felt like a long time. The winger was still smiling as he came back downstair, yellow polo in hand. He handed it to him, leaning down to place a firm kiss tohis forehead. "Yellow will always be your color."

"Thanks, Marchy," Tyler looked up at the winger, looked him in his eyes and smiled.

He dressed quickly as Brad called him a cab. They waved at each other before Tyler went outside to wait for the driver. The center was embarassed at the tears forming at his eyelids. But hey, he never was good with goodbyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just quickly want to thank everyone who has read this so far, you all are awesome!
> 
> Don't be afraid to leave me a little feedback in the comments, it'd be super duper greatly appreciated :)


	6. if you wanted honestly, that's all you had to say

Tyler woke up feeling stiff and as if he hadn't been sleeping for the past five hours. He barely remembers coming back to the hotel, greeted by a sleeping Jamie. Unfortunately, everything that had ocurred before that was painfully clear in his memory. And upon looking in the mirror, he realized it was going to be just as obvious to every one else.

He traced around the edge of a particularly dark purple spot high on his neck, contrasting shamefully against the pale skin of his neck. Tyler absolutely was not in the mood to be badgered and chirpped by his teammates all the way to Dallas, but there was no way for him to hide it. He'd just had to be a man and own up to the shit he got himself into. The main thing he hoped for was that Jamie wasn't too ashamed of him...

Speaking of his road rommie, there was a knock on the bathroom door. "Hey, Tyler," a still sleep-ridden voice mumbled through the wood. "I gotta piss."

Tyler blushed, "'Kay." He kept his eyes downcast as the winger opened the door and pushed past him into the bathroom. Tyler turned and shut the door behind him.

He walked over to his bed, not able to get last night out of his mind. Everything just felt weird to the center. He doesn't know why he went along with Brad, unsure why he allowed those things to happen. And last night, for a fleeting moment, he wanted to imagine it was another left winger sucking him down. Another set of calloused hands running along his skin, a darker brunette's hair tangled between his fingers. Tyler felt himself shiver as he thought about it. How hadn't he noticed his feelings for his _captain_? Of all fucking people. 

The center knew it was stupid, but tears sprang to his eyes. And he had to quickly blink them away as the bathroom door reopened. Jamie strode out, running his right hand through smooth hair. He shot Tyler a smile, a dopey one behind half-lidded eyes. Jamie wasn't exactly a morning person (not that Tyler could blame him) and that's probably why he hadn't flipped out right away. Although, he was expecting a little bit of backlash (i.e. chirps, laughs, endless questions about how he got the hickies), he definitly wasn't expecting Jamie to be _angry_.

**Jamie's POV**

Jamie smiled at Tyler, not able to fully contain everything that the center made him feel this early in the morning. Tyler managed to reciprocate a tiny smile before Jamie let his gaze travel else where. He scratched his head as he sank down onto the bed he'd claimed as his last night. Speaking of last night, he hoped everything went okay between Ty and Marchand. Ty had come back to the room late, so he hadn't gotten a chance to ask him about it. And he was a little more than morbidly curious, you know, just like a captain should be when it comes to his teammates and their former teams.

So he looked over at his linemate, but all the words forming on his tongue were washed away because-

Oh my _God_ -

The right side of Tyler's neck was covered in marks, ranging from dull red to bright purple. Jamie's heart thudded against the walls of his chest, bile rose to his throat. _What the hell?!_

"T-tyler," as the winger spoke, the younger man met his eyes. His face turned a deep scarlet. "What... what happened?"

The center just stared at him, his mouth opening and closing a couple times before any words actually came out. "I'm sorry."

Jamie's mouth fell open. "You and... and Marchand?" He grimaced. Tyler just nodded. Something in Jamie broke, in a way he's never experienced before. He bit down on his lip, hard, and looked at the opposing wall. The older man was always careful with his emotions, kept them in check around people and especially around his teammates. And that wasn't about to change.

The center got off the bed and was approaching him. "Look, Jamie. I didn't mean for this to happen," Tyler curled his hand gently around his wrist. "It just did," Jamie shook it off with his frown deepening. The younger man looked really upset. "I'm sorry."

Jamie just shook his head, trying to will away every visual of Marchand _touching_ Tyler, of Tyler loving him back, out of it. He couldn't, wouldn't, allow himself to fantasize about Tyler coming back with him instead, of Tyler allowing _Jamie_ to touch and mark him as his own.

The winger turned around, yanking him mostly unpacked bag off the ground, and hauled ass out the door. And if Tyler had been calling after him, he ignored him. He ignored everything, from the way his body shook as he walked down the quiet corridor to the way his eyes betrayed him by leaking down his cheeks. The way he stood in front of Kari's door and knocked in such a way that would surely be frowned upon on Canadian soil. Kari's face when he opened the door appeared as if he planned on telling him as such. But after seeing his captain's current state, his closed his mouth and moving aside.

"Eakin's using the shower," the netminder patted him on the back. "Sit down."

Jamie hung his head as he shuffled into the room. On any normal occassion, he would have given Kari a few good chirps on the horrid state of the room. Instead, he sat down on the edge of the neater of the two beds and prepared himself for a therapy session that Jamie swore was a regular part of a goalie's training.

"So, Chubbs," Kari made himself comfortable on the adjacent bed. "Tell me what happened."

"I'm in love with Tyler." Jamie blurted.

And the goalie laughed. Jamie scowled at Kari, not finding any humor in this situation. He just smiled at Jamie and said, "And I thought we were _never_ going to have this conversation."


	7. you know me all too well

Tyler didn t know what to do. Jamie wouldn't talk to him, wouldn't even _look_ at him unless absolutely necessary. And it was killing the center.

He tried talking to Jordie, Jamie's brother, about it, but to no avail. Tyre knew that there was no way he was going to attempt talking to anyone else on the team (let's just say that Patrice and Tuukka can't keep a secret to save their lives). So that left him with only one viable option.

"Beau," Tyler whined as soon as the blonde picked up. The center called the winger as soon as he had reached his apartment. Practice today had drained him more than per usual and he just needed to fucking _talk_ to someone.

"Hey, Segs. What's wrong this time?" Beau never failed to recognize when he needed something serious opposed to when he just wanted to fuck around. That was one of the main reasons Beau became his best friend.

Tyler swallowed. "'Kay, well. I pretty much fucked up everything that I had with Jamie by sleeping with Brad last week," there was an audible sigh from the other end, but no verbal response. He kept going. "I think the worst part is that I'm just now realizing I even wanted anything with him... And you know how bad I am at damage control."

"Tyler," he could practically picture the blonde shaking his head. "Could you just... _try_ to keep yourself out of such deep shit?" The center laughed. It was devoid of any actual humor. "I mean. Seriously, Seggy, how could you fuck this up? That man is head over fucking heel for you, dude. Like what the hell?"

The brunette hung his head, surpressing a groan- how could he not have noticed?! "I know, Beau. I just..." There was really no way for him to finish that sentence, no way for him to even attempt putting what he was feeling into words.

"You gotta talk to him, man." Tyler muttered in agreemeent with the winger, but honestly just thinking about that conversation made his head throb. "I gotta go, Segs. Call me if you need anything, like, literally anything. I love you, man."

"Yeah, thanks, Sunshine. Don't know I'd do without you."

"Yup, and that makes two of us." They ended the phone call with a laugh.

Tyler knew what he had to do. It wasn't going to be easy, but not a lot of things in his life have been.

*

It had been a long weekend. A 4-2 loss to Chicago by a shootout loss to Columbus, it was extremly taxing- mentally as well as physically. The last thing he wanted to deal with was a knock on his hotel room door after he'd settled into a loose pair of sweats, wanting to lose himself to music and sleep. Obviously, things never go the way their planned.

"Yeah?" Tyler didn't bother to peek at who it was through the peephole. In retrospect, he supposed he should have so he wouldn't have been so sartled at the sight of Jamie standing timidly in the hallway. Compared to Jamie's fully-clothed body, Tyler felt immensly undressed. It caused a blush to spread from his cheeks to his chest. He ran a shaking hand through his brown hair. "Hey, Jamie?"

The captain looked down, as if afraid to meet the center's eyes. "May I come in?"

Tyler sighed and moved away fromthe door, muttering a word of permission as he stalked toward his messed up bed. The center's eyes tracked the older man's every move. The winger walked foward slowly, positioning himself in front of Tyler. When he finally met the younger man's eyes, they were a dark brown- hard and withdrawn. Tyler didn't know how long they stayed like that, staring into each other's eyes as if every word they want to say is written into their dark pupils.

"Tyler," Jamie sank slowly onto the bed adjacent from Tyler. "I hope you know how important you are, not just to the team, but... but also to me. A-and I want you to understand that I love you, Ty. I love everything about you. You're, you're just," the older man trailed off, at a loss for words as he stared into the center's eyes.

And _oh_.

Tyler's face burned with the fact that tears were starting to blur his vision. "No one's ever told me they loved me just for... well, me." He hated how pathetic his voice sounded, but it was true. Aside from Beau, no one had ever really loved him past all the hockey stuff.

Jamie's face look conflicted as he searched the center's eyes. "That's... that's really sad, Ty. Because you're worth it. You're so damn great and I want you to know that." The winger's cheeks were turning red. It was fucking adorable to Tyler and, against his every will, streaks of wet salt began to stain his face.

That's when Jamie moved from that bed onto Tyler's and engulfed him a hug- almost as bonecrushing as Beau's, yet sweeter in the most unexpected way. The center was powerless when his arms wrapped around the older man's waist. His face fit perfectly in the space between Jamie's neck and shoulder, and his nose was flooded with Jamie's scent.

"Jamie.. oh, Jamie. You gotta know that I love you, too. You've got to." Words just started streaming out of his mouth. They were contorted by sobs and muffled against the other maan's neck, but he didn't care. He had to get them out. "Every since that first day at Airline. I've loved you t-this whole time, b-but I didn't realize it un-until it was almost too late. Oh God, Jamie." His fingers were like claws in the back of Jamie's suit jacket, but there was no way for him to relax them. He never wanted to let go of winger.

"It's okay, Ty," he was rubbing small circles between the center's shoulder blades as he sobbed. " _We'll_ be okay. I promise." Jamie placed a dry kiss to the top of his hair.

Tyle doesn't know how long Jamie stayed with him like that, whispering little comforts to him. But, during that time, he realized he had been right all those months ago. This is where he was meant to be, this was going to be the beginning of the rest of his life. And he couldn't be happier with who he was going to be spending it with.

With Jamie by his side, Tyler knew he could conquer anything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope this way good, sorry it took a little longer than usual. There will probably only be one, possibly two, more chapters of this and I'll be done. Thank you to everyone who has read this so far!


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